You know the saying you always hurt the one you love? Well I think it goes both ways--
The one you love always hurts you too.
Its a struggle that it feels like no one will win. I don't know how long anyone can fight. Tell me it won't last forever.
Whatever it is, I STILL LOVE U BABE!
I FUCKING LOVE U GARFIELD!
Friday, January 30, 2009
Thursday, January 29, 2009
It's just a figure
When it comes to dating, is age really just a number?
For the first time in my life, I’m in a serious relationship in which there exists an age gap; I’m 26, my partner is 33. There’s a little more than 7 years difference between us. Previous ones were either the same age as me or a year older and it got me thinking about this whole "age" thing.
But, of course, relationships are about more than attraction.
When it comes to the internal relationship factors like personality, goals, values and the like, age is just one of many elements shaping these multifaceted expressions of our individuality.
For a 25 year old, I regard myself as pretty immature. My partner, on the other hand, is quite mature. In other words, we probably meet somewhere in the middle. I have seen a lot of very childish 40 and 50-somethings. And I know many very grown-up young adults. Sure, more 50-year olds are mature than 18 year-olds, but there are countless exceptions on either side.
A similar argument can be made around life experience. I know some 40 year olds that have lived in the same town their whole life, working one or two jobs in the same field. Alternatively, I know some 20 year olds that have been thrown out of their homes, lived on the streets and somehow managed to overcome the obstacles of their situation. *wink*
So there you have it. Age, like time, is something we humans make up. Really, it tells us nothing about a person. And therefore, you don’t have to feel like a pedophile if u are dating someone WAY YOUNGER than u.
But whatever it is, I HEART my partner very much.
For the first time in my life, I’m in a serious relationship in which there exists an age gap; I’m 26, my partner is 33. There’s a little more than 7 years difference between us. Previous ones were either the same age as me or a year older and it got me thinking about this whole "age" thing.
But, of course, relationships are about more than attraction.
When it comes to the internal relationship factors like personality, goals, values and the like, age is just one of many elements shaping these multifaceted expressions of our individuality.
For a 25 year old, I regard myself as pretty immature. My partner, on the other hand, is quite mature. In other words, we probably meet somewhere in the middle. I have seen a lot of very childish 40 and 50-somethings. And I know many very grown-up young adults. Sure, more 50-year olds are mature than 18 year-olds, but there are countless exceptions on either side.
A similar argument can be made around life experience. I know some 40 year olds that have lived in the same town their whole life, working one or two jobs in the same field. Alternatively, I know some 20 year olds that have been thrown out of their homes, lived on the streets and somehow managed to overcome the obstacles of their situation. *wink*
So there you have it. Age, like time, is something we humans make up. Really, it tells us nothing about a person. And therefore, you don’t have to feel like a pedophile if u are dating someone WAY YOUNGER than u.
But whatever it is, I HEART my partner very much.
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
Let Love lead the way
I had a chat with my colleague yesterday and she inspired me to blog on this topic. Well, the story goes like this -
She has a Chinese mom and dad and thus makes her a chinese. And apparently, her boyfriend is an indian man. When her parents found out about this, they were aghasted and were so mad at her and told her to end this relationship immediately and at the same time beating her up. When she relate the story to me, she was crying and i can sense the tinge of sadness there..
Awwww... I know of some people who prefer to date/marry someone of the same race. I can think of some valid reasons why someone might prefer a same-race partner. Maybe they worried that their family or community will disapprove, and that will put a strain on the relationship. Not everyone can handle the conspicuousness that goes with marrying someone of a different race. And if it's a person of color dating a white person, there is also the issue of white privilege. Can a white partner really understand or empathize with the daily struggles that a person of color faces in our society? At the same time, I think if you refuse to even consider a partner of a different race, you may unknowingly be missing out on someone wonderful.
What the facts show is that there are differences among us, but they stem from culture, not race.
I guess at the end of the day, I’d like to think that being born an ethnic minority (4 different types of bloods) in this country doesn’t necessarily limit the pool of people I can fall in love with.
RIGHT???
She has a Chinese mom and dad and thus makes her a chinese. And apparently, her boyfriend is an indian man. When her parents found out about this, they were aghasted and were so mad at her and told her to end this relationship immediately and at the same time beating her up. When she relate the story to me, she was crying and i can sense the tinge of sadness there..
Awwww... I know of some people who prefer to date/marry someone of the same race. I can think of some valid reasons why someone might prefer a same-race partner. Maybe they worried that their family or community will disapprove, and that will put a strain on the relationship. Not everyone can handle the conspicuousness that goes with marrying someone of a different race. And if it's a person of color dating a white person, there is also the issue of white privilege. Can a white partner really understand or empathize with the daily struggles that a person of color faces in our society? At the same time, I think if you refuse to even consider a partner of a different race, you may unknowingly be missing out on someone wonderful.
What the facts show is that there are differences among us, but they stem from culture, not race.
I guess at the end of the day, I’d like to think that being born an ethnic minority (4 different types of bloods) in this country doesn’t necessarily limit the pool of people I can fall in love with.
RIGHT???
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
Poot Peet Poot Peet
Usually we will get fed up while driving because of some idiots who don’t know how to drive. For example slow ass car driving on a fast lane, people who suddenly make a turn without having their signals on… And some people will start honking when they get really angry. How the hell can they drive in 40km/h on a fast lane and don’t give a shit about my flash lights? How the hell can they just reverse their cars from the parking lot without checking if there’s any incoming cars?! But I’m so confused whether should I honk these crazy asses because I had different school of thoughts.
I’m being told that,
"If you love honking so much, I hope you will understand that there are road bullies everywhere and if you offended these people, they will KILL you! And you may never know what people will do to your car. So try to avoid honking."
On the other hand, someone also told me this, "if you don’t like honking, you might as well place a special order for your car manufacturer telling them to remove the honking function! You need car horns so that you can make people alert and aware and indirectly tell them to fuck off! What the hell are you? Acting nice?!"
Well. I’m confused… How about you? I don get to hear much car honking in Australia etc.. Unlike bloody Singapore...
I’m being told that,
"If you love honking so much, I hope you will understand that there are road bullies everywhere and if you offended these people, they will KILL you! And you may never know what people will do to your car. So try to avoid honking."
On the other hand, someone also told me this, "if you don’t like honking, you might as well place a special order for your car manufacturer telling them to remove the honking function! You need car horns so that you can make people alert and aware and indirectly tell them to fuck off! What the hell are you? Acting nice?!"
Well. I’m confused… How about you? I don get to hear much car honking in Australia etc.. Unlike bloody Singapore...
Monday, January 26, 2009
Gong Xi Fa Cai!!!!
Back then when we talk about Chinese New Year, all of us would jump for joy because being a kid has loads of benefits! You can shamelessly ask for ang pau from your relatives or parents’ friends.
But now things have changed, firecrackers are banned because some people burnt themselves. And also, for those of you who are anticipating expensive ang pau(s), I’m sorry to be the bearer of the bad news, we are still having economic recession, if you get 2 bucks you should be laughing your way to the bank.. "Times are bad" is the "in" phrase now!
The things that i hate during CNY is:
The weather
I don’t know if it’s just me because especially during Chinese New Year, the weather can really kill you. Many people fall sick during Chinese New Year because of the God damn hot weather, maybe the sun wants to celebrate it too? Plus, with the cookies and all, if you don’t watch what you’re eating, you’ll have to celebrate CNY with fever and/or sore throat.
The kids:
One word: Nightmare
The lion dancers:
You have no idea how annoying you guys are, with the cibai dong dong chiang is enough to deafen the whole world and you guys have to even lit the big ass firecracker? Oh gosh! SOS please! I know it’s a symbolic thing but it’s not symbolic if you have to hear them 20 times a day, oh how is that possible? Try staying in an apartment/flat and see if you udnerstand what I mean.
CNY songs:
I don’t know who the idiot invented this idea, to transform the decent CNY songs into TECHNO version. WTF is wrong with you people? Some decent version are already creating sound pollution and you have to turn it into a techno shit? It’s Chinese New Year not Clubbing New Year you bitches!!! I hope whoever that makes this shit out will become deaf soon!
I’m not saying CNY is bad, I’m just not that excited anymore. Nevertheless, I still wanna wish all of my sweet readers a happy Chinese New Year! And I hope y’all will get expensive ang pau(s) this year despite economic recession.
GONG XI FA CAI!!!!!
But now things have changed, firecrackers are banned because some people burnt themselves. And also, for those of you who are anticipating expensive ang pau(s), I’m sorry to be the bearer of the bad news, we are still having economic recession, if you get 2 bucks you should be laughing your way to the bank.. "Times are bad" is the "in" phrase now!
The things that i hate during CNY is:
The weather
I don’t know if it’s just me because especially during Chinese New Year, the weather can really kill you. Many people fall sick during Chinese New Year because of the God damn hot weather, maybe the sun wants to celebrate it too? Plus, with the cookies and all, if you don’t watch what you’re eating, you’ll have to celebrate CNY with fever and/or sore throat.
The kids:
One word: Nightmare
The lion dancers:
You have no idea how annoying you guys are, with the cibai dong dong chiang is enough to deafen the whole world and you guys have to even lit the big ass firecracker? Oh gosh! SOS please! I know it’s a symbolic thing but it’s not symbolic if you have to hear them 20 times a day, oh how is that possible? Try staying in an apartment/flat and see if you udnerstand what I mean.
CNY songs:
I don’t know who the idiot invented this idea, to transform the decent CNY songs into TECHNO version. WTF is wrong with you people? Some decent version are already creating sound pollution and you have to turn it into a techno shit? It’s Chinese New Year not Clubbing New Year you bitches!!! I hope whoever that makes this shit out will become deaf soon!
I’m not saying CNY is bad, I’m just not that excited anymore. Nevertheless, I still wanna wish all of my sweet readers a happy Chinese New Year! And I hope y’all will get expensive ang pau(s) this year despite economic recession.
GONG XI FA CAI!!!!!
Sunday, January 25, 2009
A question
Here is a question for all of you peeps:
If you ignore someone long enough, will they eventually go away?
If you ignore someone long enough, will they eventually go away?
Wednesday, January 21, 2009
Love me, Love me not
Everyone wants to find love in the arms of another. But why is it in these days that people tend to be so insecure once they started to fall in love, giving tidal wave of negative thoughts, feelings, emotions and whatnots, and began to imagine a lot of other negative stuff on the other.
Although rationally there is nothing wrong with both of them but somehow one are just feeling so insecure of being hurt, betrayed or etc. Most people started to feel insecure whenever their partner mingles around the opposite gender, etc... They will question trust and emphasize more on trust and love whenever possible.
I wonder how do you make the other party feel secure in love or how do you make yourself secure in love? Is it by the constant need of assurance from the 3 lovely words by your partner or is it by the constant emphasizing of trust in everything both of you does? Do you need a lot of constant assurance verbally to make you feel secure of his/her feelings towards you? Do you need a lot of constant assurance verbally to make sure that the other understands the word trust in a relationship? Or perhaps knowing it in your heart is enough? Or have you tell your partner enough to assure him/her?
Personally i think if we love someone, and considering that the fact that there's not much adjective for love, we should show it through our actions. In this way, the other party will be able to feel our love and feel secured. Security is also leveled up with trust and always opening up to talk and share; viewing things together and not just pointing fingers to talk on the issue but not on the people.
I prefer my partner to be there for me when i need him and it gives me security. To ask how's my day, etc.. Saying that he loves me. i agree that this will give me security.. but sacrificing and pouring out time for me will make me know that i am important to him and he treasures me, so i feel secured.
If its just one party who always says " i love u" is also of a no use as it takes 2 to tango. We need both hands to clap.
Although rationally there is nothing wrong with both of them but somehow one are just feeling so insecure of being hurt, betrayed or etc. Most people started to feel insecure whenever their partner mingles around the opposite gender, etc... They will question trust and emphasize more on trust and love whenever possible.
I wonder how do you make the other party feel secure in love or how do you make yourself secure in love? Is it by the constant need of assurance from the 3 lovely words by your partner or is it by the constant emphasizing of trust in everything both of you does? Do you need a lot of constant assurance verbally to make you feel secure of his/her feelings towards you? Do you need a lot of constant assurance verbally to make sure that the other understands the word trust in a relationship? Or perhaps knowing it in your heart is enough? Or have you tell your partner enough to assure him/her?
Personally i think if we love someone, and considering that the fact that there's not much adjective for love, we should show it through our actions. In this way, the other party will be able to feel our love and feel secured. Security is also leveled up with trust and always opening up to talk and share; viewing things together and not just pointing fingers to talk on the issue but not on the people.
I prefer my partner to be there for me when i need him and it gives me security. To ask how's my day, etc.. Saying that he loves me. i agree that this will give me security.. but sacrificing and pouring out time for me will make me know that i am important to him and he treasures me, so i feel secured.
If its just one party who always says " i love u" is also of a no use as it takes 2 to tango. We need both hands to clap.
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
.......
If I get upset with you
It doesn't mean I don't care,
Everyone has bad days
I'm sure of this you're aware
If you end up getting mad,
Instead of asking me what's wrong,
Our relationship can be hurt.
Instead of staying strong
So if and when I'm upset with you
Please don't just ignore me
Because if you do that
Then where will our relationship be?
Just ask me why I'm upset
We can talk it out
After all that's what relationships
Are all about
I M SORRY MR GARFIELD. . :(
It doesn't mean I don't care,
Everyone has bad days
I'm sure of this you're aware
If you end up getting mad,
Instead of asking me what's wrong,
Our relationship can be hurt.
Instead of staying strong
So if and when I'm upset with you
Please don't just ignore me
Because if you do that
Then where will our relationship be?
Just ask me why I'm upset
We can talk it out
After all that's what relationships
Are all about
I M SORRY MR GARFIELD. . :(
I'm sorry
Some people have said that I sounded very down. I guess that's true.
I don't mean to sound that way, but sometimes I have bad days. I guess that comes through in my writing. I've been tempted not to publish some of them, but everyone says that if that's the way I feel on that day, so be it.
It's hard not to let everything we're going through get to us sometimes. Some days the burden seems greater, seems almost too much to bear. I know I shouldn't, but some days I want to feel sorry for myself, to give in to the dark side.
I was trying so hard to please everyone, to make everyone smile, to make everyone happy. Seeing people happy means a lot to me. It is never easy to please everyone. I make mistakes but i m just a human being after. It's hard for me to express such sadness through words. There aren't any words to say how deeply saddened i am. .
I don’t really understand human nature sometimes. I guess its just part and parcel of being human. Maybe i shall just leave EVERYONE alone..
I don't mean to sound that way, but sometimes I have bad days. I guess that comes through in my writing. I've been tempted not to publish some of them, but everyone says that if that's the way I feel on that day, so be it.
It's hard not to let everything we're going through get to us sometimes. Some days the burden seems greater, seems almost too much to bear. I know I shouldn't, but some days I want to feel sorry for myself, to give in to the dark side.
I was trying so hard to please everyone, to make everyone smile, to make everyone happy. Seeing people happy means a lot to me. It is never easy to please everyone. I make mistakes but i m just a human being after. It's hard for me to express such sadness through words. There aren't any words to say how deeply saddened i am. .
I don’t really understand human nature sometimes. I guess its just part and parcel of being human. Maybe i shall just leave EVERYONE alone..
Sunday, January 18, 2009
The irony
He’s old. Too old for you. Both old and too old for you.And he’s ugly. Fat and ugly.
But you move towards him. You come close to him. Between his legs. Your butt touches his inner thigh. Rubs against it. And you sit on him. Dangerously close to his crotch.
You do that only because he gives you gifts. You claim to like him, but that’s only because he showers you with gifts.
You call him your sugar daddy.
Then again, if he’s wearing this thick red outfit with white fur lining, you call him Santa Claus.
How ironic!
This is such an inane post that I almost didn’t want to publish it! And no offense to all the sugar daddies out there hey.
But you move towards him. You come close to him. Between his legs. Your butt touches his inner thigh. Rubs against it. And you sit on him. Dangerously close to his crotch.
You do that only because he gives you gifts. You claim to like him, but that’s only because he showers you with gifts.
You call him your sugar daddy.
Then again, if he’s wearing this thick red outfit with white fur lining, you call him Santa Claus.
How ironic!
This is such an inane post that I almost didn’t want to publish it! And no offense to all the sugar daddies out there hey.
Thursday, January 15, 2009
The value of trust and honesty
I wanted to know how do u all react when a spouse or significant other is dishonest, inconsiderate or having an affair. I wondered if it is possible to rebuild trust in someone who disappoints us greatly.
I know people are human, frail, and sinful. Therefore, we need a realistic type of trust when we choose to trust someone. We can have a limited trust in people as we grow to know them and they see we really care about them but the fact is that people will let us down. That is reality. Obviously, when someone has broken their vows and been unfaithful, has lied or been dishonest in the relationship, they need to change.
I know we will never be perfect and therefore, will probably disappoint our loved ones as well. We can promise to never say something hurtful or never tell a lie or never exaggerate or always keep our promises or whatever but since we are human, we will also make mistakes and disappoint that person.
IMO, the components of love, forgiveness and commitment are as necessary to trust in a relationship as is honesty. Forgiveness gives you the chance to start over and trust another fallible human being again. Love helps to nourish trust. Commitment and honesty provide accountability to one another.
So, do u think it is possible to rebuild trust in someone who disappoints us greatly???
I know people are human, frail, and sinful. Therefore, we need a realistic type of trust when we choose to trust someone. We can have a limited trust in people as we grow to know them and they see we really care about them but the fact is that people will let us down. That is reality. Obviously, when someone has broken their vows and been unfaithful, has lied or been dishonest in the relationship, they need to change.
I know we will never be perfect and therefore, will probably disappoint our loved ones as well. We can promise to never say something hurtful or never tell a lie or never exaggerate or always keep our promises or whatever but since we are human, we will also make mistakes and disappoint that person.
IMO, the components of love, forgiveness and commitment are as necessary to trust in a relationship as is honesty. Forgiveness gives you the chance to start over and trust another fallible human being again. Love helps to nourish trust. Commitment and honesty provide accountability to one another.
So, do u think it is possible to rebuild trust in someone who disappoints us greatly???
Saturday, January 10, 2009
Struggling?
There comes a point in your life when you’re officially an adult. Suddenly, you’re old enough to vote, drink, and engage in other adult activities. Suddenly, people expect you to be responsible. Serious. A grown-up. We get taller, we get older, but do we ever really grow up?
In some ways we grow up. We have families, we get married… divorced. But for the most part, we still have the same problems that we did when we were fifteen. No matter how much we grow taller, grow older, we are still forever stumbling. Forever wondering.
Forever… young.
In some ways we grow up. We have families, we get married… divorced. But for the most part, we still have the same problems that we did when we were fifteen. No matter how much we grow taller, grow older, we are still forever stumbling. Forever wondering.
Forever… young.
Elites?? Nah..
Stuck up, know it all, or arrogant. Whatever you want to call them, they are who they are. I did not know why, but arrogance is not something you purposely feel like becoming to show off. It is a natural habit that evolves over time once you become an expert, or know something so well to the point that it becomes part of you.
IMO, these are top arrogant people.
1) University Professors. University math professors get my vote for most arrogant. They treat you like a moron if you don’t understand something or ask a question. That really annoys me when it’s their job to guide you.
2) Doctors are the second most natural arrogant bastards. They give you a straight answer without thinking, and sometimes chuckle at the end of the sentence because you asked it. “How come you did not know that?” is their constant question to every question you ask them. Maybe because I am NOT a doctor is my answer. I did not spend my 20’s learning about a microscopic part of my body that can only be fixed by a 10 hour surgery. That’s not my problem. So stop being arrogant about how much you know! We know you know too much, so help us! What makes it even worse, some students who study medicine who are full of arrogance just pissed me off with their medical school jargons.. Sigh..
3) The third most arrogant bastards, the Engineers. Why are Engineers arrogant? Maybe because they spend 90% of their time designing something so great, so magnificent, and then there is that chance where it actually ends up working and being kick ass awesome! Awesome is what they describe their products. Yes, awesome! And when the final product is displayed to the world, their arrogance increases 10 folds. The more they succeed, the more arrogant they become. I don’t blame them. They do build awesome stuff that does change the world.
I finally understand why some people are full of arrogance.
IMO, these are top arrogant people.
1) University Professors. University math professors get my vote for most arrogant. They treat you like a moron if you don’t understand something or ask a question. That really annoys me when it’s their job to guide you.
2) Doctors are the second most natural arrogant bastards. They give you a straight answer without thinking, and sometimes chuckle at the end of the sentence because you asked it. “How come you did not know that?” is their constant question to every question you ask them. Maybe because I am NOT a doctor is my answer. I did not spend my 20’s learning about a microscopic part of my body that can only be fixed by a 10 hour surgery. That’s not my problem. So stop being arrogant about how much you know! We know you know too much, so help us! What makes it even worse, some students who study medicine who are full of arrogance just pissed me off with their medical school jargons.. Sigh..
3) The third most arrogant bastards, the Engineers. Why are Engineers arrogant? Maybe because they spend 90% of their time designing something so great, so magnificent, and then there is that chance where it actually ends up working and being kick ass awesome! Awesome is what they describe their products. Yes, awesome! And when the final product is displayed to the world, their arrogance increases 10 folds. The more they succeed, the more arrogant they become. I don’t blame them. They do build awesome stuff that does change the world.
I finally understand why some people are full of arrogance.
Tuesday, January 6, 2009
Cunts
I don’t want to talk about what really happened because I don’t feel like crying. However, all I can say that life is shit. People tell me, oh get over, oh you are a pathetic whiner, complainer, whinger, blah blah. Maybe I am just like everyone else, have you ever thought of that? But, have you ever felt pain in your chest? Do you feel real physical pain? Do you really know how it is to be heart broken? For some of you who don’t understand, let me explain it.
My heart for the past days has been hurting a lot. I feel like someone is squeezing it so bad to the point that I can’t breath. You see, some of us humans have a heart. And we are sensitive, and we mask ourselves with such a tough fake exterior to survive life day by day. And i hate to pretend nothing really happened or whatsoever hey.
Some people, they just come flocking to me saying the meanest things, and think I have no feelings. I have feelings dammit, and I cry. Who says guys cant cry?? Cunts!
My heart for the past days has been hurting a lot. I feel like someone is squeezing it so bad to the point that I can’t breath. You see, some of us humans have a heart. And we are sensitive, and we mask ourselves with such a tough fake exterior to survive life day by day. And i hate to pretend nothing really happened or whatsoever hey.
Some people, they just come flocking to me saying the meanest things, and think I have no feelings. I have feelings dammit, and I cry. Who says guys cant cry?? Cunts!
